Last year, I wrote a very special resolution. Having a little shop and a blog named for my mom, who wrote a letter a day for over 50 years, I thought I would take up that habit, myself, for just a year. As a child, I had watched with curiosity as my mother carried out her beloved letter writing ritual. She used to tell stories of how I would climb up in the chair next to her, ask for a piece of paper and pencil, then proceed to write rows of the curly scribbles classic for most preschoolers. As I got older, I delighted in watching her carefully choose the card or stationary that would carry her words of friendship and love. Always awed at the magnitude of her compassion and empathy, I would listen as she explained why she felt compelled to send this or that card. "This one is for Mary" she would say, "Mary lost her husband over a year ago. Most people will have stopped sending cards by now but I bet she could still use some encouragement." Over the years, I heard so many people express their appreciation for my mother's faithful notes of love, caring and encouragement. For some, those notes were monumental is helping them through rough times in their lives.
I don't think it's surprising that I decided to try and follow in my mother's letter writing footsteps. After all, I'd seen that practice modeled for my entire life, seen how it had touched people's lives, and I typically sent cards of celebration or condolences to my friends anyway. What is surprising is that I was so clueless about what a massive task I was undertaking. By February, I was already eight cards behind. I'd get caught up only to fall behind again. If there were no calendared dates to celebrate, I would need to search my head for events I knew my friends were engaged in. "Are you enjoying your promotion?" "How's yoga class progressing?" I actually loved trying to remember special events going on in friends' lives but there were times when it felt a bit contrived. "Please, doesn't somebody need a card? I need to send 10 by tomorrow!!!" Still I persevered.
At the end of 2013, I was not able to say that I had seen my resolution to perfect completion. But regardless of my struggles and stumbles along the way, I still learned a lot about myself and the art of letter writing. Even more significant (for me) were the valuable truths it reinforced:
- Failure is relative... I wrote a total of 205 letters...56% of my goal. Reminding 205 friends that they matter to my life can't be considered a failure regardless of what the numbers say.
- Things that matter the most need to be a priority...Seems like a no-brainer but when I started writing in January, I told myself that I'd easily find 30 minutes a day to write a letter. I rarely found that half-hour until I scheduled it into my daily routine.
- Never Never Give Up... Even though I'd already fallen behind by the end of January, I didn't give up. There aren't many things that are as important to me as celebrating friendships and honoring my mother's letter writing legacy so I just kept forging ahead. I'm going to continue writing in 2014.
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